Thursday, August 20, 2009

Crazy love

crazy love

MY life is a tad insane. I know it. I admit it. I have right now, a plastic box with rocks and frogs in my entry. I have two new kittens who feel the need to BE everywhere all the time. Add to that the five current children. My brooding preteen who needs constant toddler-like reassurance of my affection. My very practical 9 year old who keeps us all balanced and tries to maintain peace(emotionally that is-- he literally bounces off walls physically!) My adorably sweet 7 year old who has become a little, um, emotional. She prays every day for her "two new sisters to come quickly," but I think she is very nervous about their coming too. My #4 asked me yesterday if I could change his name to Miguel.(?!) He is , hm, words escape me. He has been rough today, and every day for the last 5 yrs. He is a "challenge to parent,""strong -willed", "spirited" those are the terms the books call him. He requires so much of my attention, emotions and constant discipline that I feel like a wrung out sponge some days. But I also see his growth and improvement and feel grateful for my boy. The first I did not birth, but the very first to come by adoption. Then there is my baby. Who lately hates being called that. She is quiet and shy and her brother's faithful minion. Those two are biologically linked (they share a birthmom) and so spiritually linked it still baffles me. When she was a newborn and he was 14 mos old, I had their cribs in the same room, end to end. I would wake up to check on them early and find him curled up around her!! With one chubby arm protectively over her and his other around his night night. This sight was terrifying night after night, but at the same time, comforting. They needed me, but just as importantly, they needed each other. How lucky am I to get to see that. She is 4 and FINALLY warming up to people. Family members are saying she is "coming out of her shell". She says, "mommy, I yoves(loves) you!", AND. . .(dramatic pause) I YIKE (like) you!!" Well, thanks Sweetie, that says it all. I like you too AND I love you. Love is like. . . a yo yo we let it go we roll it up. . . over and over and it always thrills me when it comes back. Love is like opening a present, every time a kid says I love you to me, I feel like someone just gave me a present. Every slobbery kiss. . . sticky handed hug. Crazy wild and lovely.

2 comments:

*Overflowing* said...

such a sweet post! you are a fabulous mama and i can't wait till your girls are home!

Jean said...

Wow-Hezra that is so beautifully written- what a great post! It is so heartwarming to hear those words- thank goodness they do come back to us because sometimes we just need to hear them so we know what we are doing is good.

Looking forward to seeing your family grow with your two new additions!!
Blessings to you!