Monday, May 24, 2010

green things

(poison sumac)

(poison ivy)

(poison oak)

The good news is, I think I can identify these pretty well now. The bad news is, they are all over our teensey not quite one acre property. I have heard goats eat this stuff, and I am not even kidding about buying a goat for that one purpose! I cant burn it, it may kill me! I cant cut it down. I cant leave it to grow and flourish and continue to be the Poison forest, or the yard of death. I can't hide out in the house forever.

I love to be outside. I love the fresh air. I love just sitting and watching nature happen. Unfortunately, nature is unkind to me. The sun blisters my skin, and freckles me so sadly. The stark light of day is unattractively florescent when hitting my freakishly white skin. I am allergic to everything. It is sad to admit it. Nerdy, un classy, and sad. But it is true!! The clothes line I love so much? It cost me 100.00 for a stupid teensey bottle of eye drops because my new eye Dr says my eyelids are breaking out on the inside???!!! I am allergic to wasps? Mosquito bites leave giant welts. (ok, I am not making this stuff up-- I had two great aunts that died(DIED!) from beestings, my dad tells me) Then top all that off with extreme sensitivity to poison leaves of any kind. Well, it really doesnt even have to be the poison variety. I once broke out from playing with little berry thingys on an evergreen tree. But the really bad stuff? Poison Sumac, Poison Ivy,and Poison Oak? Well, I don't even have to touch them. Two weeks ago, I bathed a kid that had cavorted in them. I got it worse than the kid! I looked like a battered wife with one eye swollen for several days! Just as that healed up, I was outside talking on my cell phone, and my cat jumped up on my lap. He swished his tail on my neck and I thought NOOOOOO!! I ran inside and hung up the phone, I used my handy new scrub and scrubbed my face furiously. Apparently I did not get my neck as well. I am now swollen and welted and itching again. I am taking benadryl. Again. I hate feeling this way and I love being outside!!! I hate looking at all green things with a feeling of fear and comtempt. I hate itching burning sensations that leave me swollen and hideous. I hate being whiney. It really is as unattractive as being allergic to practically everything. But I am whiney(and did I mention itchy?). I now want to mow the yard down to bare dirt, cut ALL greenery from my trees and yard...(we have tons of climbing vines) And find homes for all our pets.(2 cats, two dogs and a white rabbit that escaped our yard and has been living in the woods outside our fence for weeks. There is no stinking way I will even TOUCH that thing!!!) But for now, I wil escape to the bliss of a benadryl induced coma for the next several hrs. and try not to scratch. Maybe I will dream of moving to an apartment without any pets or plants. Maybe I will dream up a solution to my problem.

No comments: